I know, right? So here I am just tooling along, feeling better and better each day, taking my meds on time, resting when i should, trying to eat the right foods, tra la la'ing about Christmas, planning daughter weddings, forgetting about that ole' disease.... and then I get this ~
|writing/highlight is by nurseperson; coffee stains mine.|
its a directive for the first of many c-scans this year, at the 3 month marker. Since we decided to do the wait and see approach after I refused radiation, this is where the brick hits the road so to speak...brick? oh whatever...put something heavy in there to substitute....Anyhow these kind of letters makes me stomp when I walk, muttering, in a crazy "pushing a shopping cart full of kittens around in a Humane Society parking lot at midnight" sort of way. never a good thing...
So its not exactly an invite, is it? did this poor person have a rough day or what? It has so many threatening underlinings, circlings, squarelings, highlights and one severe exclamation point that I was tempted to call the FBI ~
Did they forget that I am a humble (well, almost, since having a blog kinda reduces..well...nevermind) self employed Timber Cruiser who lives 3 hours away, with a huge yearly deductable - I have to pay for this threatening visit. They be expensive dates with no gourmet meal, no cheese, but lots of whine on my part...I'd rather have a new slabby-sided pony gelding I can ride comfortably, thank you. But I "get back on the fat pony" so to speak and I read on. What I read makes me irritated, because I DONT WANT A TWO DAY MEDICAL VACATION IN FEBRUARY ~
they make the c-scan at 8:20 AM - but tell me I have to do labs and pick up the contrast and drink it 90 minutes BEFORE ...which means ~
IF I dont spend the time and money to arrive there the day before, then I have to get up and get dressed and leave by 3:50 AM , drive 3 hours to be there at 6:50 to pick up the contrast (are they even open then?), start drinking it for breakfast and getting my blood drawn - which the lab doesnt even open until 7:30 - this makes ME start to wonder if they also left surgical tools inside me from surgery if they couldnt figure this simple appt thing out 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE - giving me just one more issue to fret about when i get some funny pain when i first lay down in bed at night and wonder "am i going to die?!!" then stay up all night so I dont miss a thing if i die.
So anyhow, I dont think so.
So after a few work phone calls to exercise my "but i AM a nice person" muscle, I give them a call...and ALL the nurses are gone, theres no doctors in ..and I get the tiniest little voice on the other end saying shes just filling in - she sounds like shes 11 years old - great...they hire someones 11 year old daughter so people like me have to be REALLY patient and be a nice patient when all the doctors and nurses scatter for their Christmas Parties and vacays on a FRIDAY unlike some of us (yes, that is massive petty jealousy and ugly envy in my voice - here at our office of 2 self-employed married to each other people we do not have Christmas office P.A.R.T.I.E.S!!!! we work to pay MEDICAL B.I.L.L.S!!!! ! (extra exclamation point for dramatization...wait, maybe me and this nurseperson who wrote this out have a lot in common... ?! ) and can you actually put parentheses inside of parentheses? "I break all boundaries!!! aaarrrr!!!" says the creative writing blog-pirate with the really nice boots). So I briefly explain the situation, and lo and behold, she's not only old enough to understand, but she ACTUALLY changes the appt to a later time on the same date, all with a sunshiney attitude...and the icicles of envy and jealousy melt in my ice-y humble (well...nevermind) tiny grinch-y heart. But then i remember-
"can you please include my allergies where it is blank under allergies? I have a doozy one that almost killed me and put me in ICU awhile back, im not sure why its not listed" - another story another post - but this is why I eyeball every pill like its going to grow legs and pull out a cannon to get me. You can imagine that while I was in the hospital this last time I might have been just a little edgey when the night nurses did their 3 am visits with drugs - thats why I made Mr. Foresterman sleep in the lazy boy there...for five days...yes, he is a saint.
"Oh sure, no problem!" she singsongs back in a cheery little bluebirds flying voice...So after I fight off the temptation to spell out the one really big medicinal word to snow white here, I am done, and its over, and its all correct. And im annoyed because I ended up with nothing to really complain about...this is going to take work, peoples.
Its going to feel like a really lonnng life if i have to do this each time.
but maybe thats their strategy?
* shrugs shoulders, starts planning a first annual Christmas Office Party for two *